Have Kids, Will Travel (Eventually)

Seems that the stomach bug is contagious and made its descent onto Isaac around 1am this morning. Poor thing was awake complaining of a "sore throat" for a few hours before his stomach finally gave way to the bug. He has been fine all day, claiming this morning that homemade biscuits would make him feel better. However, it does seem that we need a bit of an anatomy lesson to distinguish between throat and stomach. I am slightly embarrassed to admit that the first thing I said to him when I discovered he was throwing up was (I was in his bed with him during the icky hours leading up to this point), "Do not throw up on my hair." Such motherly instincts I have.

One challenge that I faced when first becoming a mother was figuring out how to get myself and another human being...that was completely helpless...out of the door on time. The first week of Isaac's life I swore to my mother that I was never leaving the house with him alone, certain that I just simply could not manage myself and a baby in public. Restlessness set in and soon I was venturing out into the world, baby in tow.

Twenty-one months later, Evelyn came along and again I decided I would have to live a life confined inside the walls of casa de phillips. Certainly I would never figure out how to get two little ones, plus myself, out the door. Once again my restlessness overtook my fears and I eventually figured out how to get the three of us out into public before 5pm.

These days I am again facing a battle...how to get two active children out the door with everyone dressed and without losing my sanity.

Let me provide an example:

Tuesday mornings we have bible study at 9am. Since the kids get up at 7am (and me before that), this provides a solid two hours to get everyone dressed, fed, and out the door. Logically, it seems that getting to bible study on time and in a peaceful manner is a feasible task for any mother.

However, in that two hours on Tuesday I experienced the following: the changing of two dirty diapers, breakfast where at least one bowl of yogurt landed upside down on our kitchen floor, the washing out of someone's hair because they decided to wear their toast as a hat, breaking up a sibling spat, dressing each child...both of who protest (Isaac because he wants to do it himself and Evelyn because she fusses EVERY TIME she is changed or dressed. Every time.), putting shoes on each child, drying my hair which causes Evelyn to cry loud wails and say "No No" repeatedly, putting shoes back on Evelyn because she took them off, packing two separate bags for their respective classes at bible study, locating the sippy cups to put back into previously packed bags after Isaac removed them for him and his sister, apply make-up, instruct children to put Tupperware back into the cabinet from which they pulled it all out and left it, get myself dressed, water backyard, clean up kitchen from breakfast, break up sibling spat, instruct Isaac to use the bathroom before leaving, put an end to Isaac's ten minute hand-washing routine, dry Isaac's shirt with the hair dryer due to his ten-minute hand washing ordeal (thus causing Evelyn to cry again), fix Evelyn's hair with a bow, grab bags and bible study materials, move everyone out to garage, inform Isaac that he cannot take sidewalk chalk to bible class, load everyone into car seats, drive to bible study, pull into parking lot to discover that Evelyn has removed both shoes and her bow in the 45 seconds it took to get to the church.

Seriously, how do Jon and Kate plus 8 ever manage to leave the house?

How do those of you with more than two kids ever leave the house before noon on any given day? Tips? Techniques? Sanity saving guidelines?

Please share!